Hey Ernie. Have I told you lately that you make a great pillow?
Mrrmph mmrrph mmrrpphh mmrrmmph.*
(*translation: Big ol’ bed and he has to sleep on top of me. Sheesh.)
That’s okay Ernie…you don’t have to say anything.
I know you like being my pillow as much as I do.
(*translation: Hey, I’m suffocating here!)